Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Vague Stirrings of Fear and Loathing

(A cross post from cipherland)

"As your attorney, I advise you to buy a motorcycle. How else can we cover a thing like this righteously?"
- Hunter S. Thompson, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas

It seemed like a great idea at the time. That time was, however, blurred by alcohol, fatigue and a need to impress. But I wasn't going to admit that as time passed and more commitment than a vague "That sounds cool, I'm in" was needed. Commitment, but no admission, was made despite the gnaw of worries. What the hell was I doing? This is madness. This can't possibly end well. I lack the essential confidence and courage to pull off what is, essentially, a test of courage and confidence. Am I man enough for this?

I'm going to have to be because, emboldened by some kind of collective mania, I booked the plane tickets. This Frankensteinian monster is lumbering on inexorably and dragging me along with it. It's really going to happen. Shit.

Later, Rob the Racist, aka my attorney*, explained a vague itinerary. I was again blurred by alcohol and fatigue, but had no desire to impress on this occasion. Luckily, the itinerary was abstruse and indefinite enough to not require significant input that I would have been unable to provide. As commitment had been made, there was no need to do anything other than nod, shrug and hand over leadership to Rob. He is the team captain, the experienced leader. I am the team halfwit, the jester. The idiot who has never ridden a motorcycle, going on a motorcycle trip up the highest motorable highway in the world, a wild and inhospitable streak of gravel zig-zagging through the mountains of country not known for hospitable roads, drivers or climate. Basically, if I don't off myself, the trucks, intestinal parasites or roads will probably get me. Or the altitude. Or the Indian army.

This is not my comfort zone. This is not easy or practical or well-planned. Or even planned for that matter. This is my unreality, an environment that I will not be able to control or mitigate.

This is not a holiday. This is an adventure.

Fuck it, let's do it.

* He is actually a real attorney. This may come in use.

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